In my quest to release the ego, there were moments of confusion about who is acting whether my higher self or ego. The clarity came when I began to see the effects of my actions on others. Sometimes, we get lost in the weeds in trying to be act through compassionate, unconditional love, and freeing ourselves of society’s rules and expectations. How do we know if it’s our higher self or ego running the show?
What I have learned recently is this. The actions of the higher self almost always benefit all parties involved and are for the greater good. The actions of ego is for self gain, possession, superiority, and recognition. However, before we can get to this recognition, we first must be honest with ourselves.
For example, one of the behaviors that I have learned through therapy is the concept of triangulation. In this behavior, there are usually three people involved. One party will attempt to go to a third person to do or say something about the second person. What happens in these circumstances is that the first and third person may try to hurt the second person through their interactions, or try to work through emotional problems without going directly to second person with whom s/he is having the conflict. This is called Triangulation, and is a form in dysfunctional behavior in relationships.
We will see this behavior in dysfunctional families, work places, relationships, and friendships. All triangulation behaviors are unhealthy and is the result of ego’s need to manipulate and control outcome. The only way to change this dynamic is to go directly to the person with whom you need to address the issues or resolve the problems without getting third-parties involved. My relationship with my parents involved triangulation, and as a result, many of my adult relationships began to mirror this type of dynamic as well.
When we encounter dysfunctional behaviors, these always originate from the ego, since the higher self will act and behave in ways that honor, respect, and treat all parties involved with compassion and kindness. Our behaviors and actions by our higher selves will never hurt other emotionally, physically, financially, or otherwise. When we begin to observe our actions as hurting others, we must heed that warning and change our ego’s behaviors. It is never too late to change ourselves for the better. Blessings and light, Brooke (Copyright 2013 Kundalini Spirit with All Rights Reserved)