As many of my readers know about my history, my father was a philanderer who lied to my family to hide his philandering. As an adult, I became attracted to philanderers and liars. My resulting adult life was filled with angst of distrusting men and suspicious of their intentions and actions. In the recent past, a man I dated brought many of these fears to the surface. While dating me, he was involved with countless other women and passed a deadly sexually transmitted disease to me and other women. This relationship really shook me and caused me to shy away from sex all together.
On this phase of my journey, I am attempting to overcome my distrust of men. First, I am aware of my feelings of distrust caused by my past experiences. In my current relationship, I am dealing with these waves of fear of being hurt and lied to again in my life. As these waves come over me, I allow them to release without reacting to them. I realize that all men have women friends as long we have a solid relationship, those other women do not bother me.
With philandering men, I notice that their attention and time are frequently redirected to the interest of other women at the expense of passing up time with me. As I am an intuit, I know when someone is lying to me, or attempting to deceive me. I frequently have confronted them to their dismay.
Every man deserves a chance. However, once they stray then I move on as I believe I deserve so much better. I don’t need leftovers as there are many fish in the sea. If we don’t demand better treatment, then we will never receive better treatment. This is what I have learned the hard way. (Copyright 2017 Awakening Journey with All Rights Reserved)