Soul Evolution: Karmic, Soulmate, or Twin Flame Relationships

Inside Of Inside

I am finally far along enough on my spiritual journey to speak a little clearer about my personal understanding and evolution to write about soul relationships.  When we are deep in it, it is difficult to differentiate between these three very distinct soul relationships.  Karmic and soulmate relationships can involve lovers, family, friends, co-workers, and anyone we encounter.  Twin flames or twin souls may begin platonic or remain platonic, but may become romantic when the souls are ready to unite.

My belief is that in all three relationships, our souls have encountered the soul of these individuals before.  They are part of our soul group, as we are on similar reincarnation cycles.  However, the difference is that they serve different purposes for our soul evolution.  On the face of things, we appear to love certain individuals more because of the purpose they serve in our soul evolution, but I believe it is all an illusion of the ego.

So this is how I understand these relationship, but you may have another perspective.  First, the karmic relationship, the most difficult of the three, are life lessons that each of our souls must encounter in order to evolve. They are chaotic, unhealthy, addictive, selfish, ego-centered, filled with drama and conflicts, and never appear to work or last.  These karmic relationships are intended to help our souls learn life lessons, and learn the difficult art of letting go.  They are very critical and important teachers for our souls.  Most earth-bound relationships are karmic in nature.

The next category are soulmate as they are those souls who serve to help us on our life journeys as they are compatible to us, provide support and care, and are our cheerleaders in our lives. They are frequently our close friends, siblings, cousins, or other family members.  These souls are necessary to help support, care, and love us on our difficult life journey. However, soulmates are not necessarily our lovers or partner.

Finally, there is the twin flame or twin soul relationship.  These are completely different than the previous two soul relationships as there are distinct and undeniable signs.  The belief is that twin flame/soul are one soul divided into two, similar to identical twins. It is difficult to deny the similarities.  Both like similar foods, have similar careers, enjoy similar hobbies, like similar physical contacts, have similar spirits (brave, vulnerable, weak, etc.),  live similar lifestyles, lived in similar places, and meet in person organically, as if brought together through synchronicity by the Universe.

Twin flames or souls may not recognized each other, and cannot unite until all the karmic relationships have been let go, life lessons have been learned, and ego is released. However, soulmate relationships still may continue concurrently with twin flame/soul relationships if they are not romantic or sexual.  In order for twin flames to unite, both twins must have learned self love, and be able to give and accept unconditional love.  Until these steps are accomplished by each twin, there cannot be union.

My observation is that most people who are in karmic or soulmate relationships believe they are with their twin flame.  It is again ego’s illusion because we so desperately need someone else to complete us. In this desperation, we fool ourselves into believing this, so ego does not need to be released, and we don’t need to do the necessary, difficult emotional and spiritual work.

So here is my belief about karmic, soulmate, and twin flame/soul relationships. They all serve very important roles for our soul evolution.  One is not necessarily  worse or better than another soul relationship category, since they are all here to help our souls evolve and help us live through our highest potential. (Awakening Journey Copyright 2017 with All Rights Reserved).

Family Karma


This weekend, I spent time with my favorite cousin. She is a schizophrenic who has recovered amazingly well and is living a full and productive life. Our time together was learning about each other, since we have not spent much time together since childhood.

This was an important weekend together since it gave us the opportunity to set healthy boundaries now that we are both recovered from our illnesses. As we began our weekend, we reverted to our childhood behaviors that was very dysfunctional and unhealthy.

We share similar family dynamics, since we grew up together. Our family shared incest, narcissism, violence, mental illness, and abuse. I believe this is our family Karma. As the weekend progressed, we acknowledge many of these dysfunctions within our family.

On the last evening of our visit, I raised awareness of how we were behaving and acting toward each other. I addressed that we were reverting back to our old and dysfunctional behaviors. My cousin was able to recognize the same, and agreed that we needed to change our dynamics together.

I felt very encouraged that we are moving forward together, although none of the other members of our family has done so. She has been my only ally in my emotional recovery work and spiritual growth. I feel so blessed that I have another family member who is attempting to change her life for the better, and spiritually progress for her soul life. (Copyright 2017 Awakening Journey with all rights reserved.)

Healing the Trifecta


There are three other members of my immediate family, including my parents and my younger brother.  Because of the abuse and dysfunctions within my family, which I believe is our family karma, I needed to overcome the abuse and dysfunctions of my family, including the roles I played with each member of my family.

About five years ago, I encountered a Kundalini active man who represented my father.  He sexually assaulted me, gave me a sexually transmitted disease, and emotionally manipulated me for my money, although I was not the only woman in this situation.  When I met him, I knew he represented my father, and I think he knew it too as I told him frequently.

Because I wanted to be near him, I applied for a job at the college where he works.  When I arrived at this college, I worked for a supervisor who is very mentally ill, irrational, and emotionally unstable.  When I began working for her, I realized that she represented my mother.

During these five years, I worked to overcome my fears of these two individuals as I was terrified, sad, and felt powerless around them.  I learned to stand up for myself, learned that I am worthy and deserve good things, and stopped giving my power to them.  Almost two years ago, I walked away from this man in March 2015, and during this same month, my supervisor was fired from her job although she was given the opportunity to retire.

Strangely, in March 2015, I hired a new staff member for my office who represents my brother.  He is a codepedent who also suffered childhood abuse in his life, and we share a similar relationship like the one I have with my brother.  During these nearly two years, I trained him for the job in my office.  However, I also knew that as long as I was his supervisor, he would continue to stay as a codependent.  My leaving this college will empower him to become independent.

Recently, I accepted another university job in California, and will be leaving my current college.  I realized that I needed to leave this college, because my job is done here as I have overcome my role with my father, mother, and brother.   My family lives in California, and I am finally ready to be with them as I already have practiced how to be with them.

I have gained self esteem, learned self love, and now am able to stand up for myself without needing their approval or acceptance of me.  It is through these difficult interactions and healing my emotional wounds that will allow me to finally be with my family without becoming a victim again.   Since I am different, my relationships with my family will be different too.  (Copyright 2016 Awakening Journey with All Rights Reserved)


How Karma Works


Karma is an ironic equalizer in the Universe.   During my spiritual journey these past five years, I have observed karma working very swiftly.  I believe that because I am on a spiritual journey and a lighworker, I have been trying to seek truth, heal myself, and empower others.  As a result, those who attempt or have harmed me have experienced negative karma nearly in the same exact manner.

During the past five years, I have been working at a college helping sexually assaulted students to protect them from futher harm and empower them to find healing for themselves.  During this time, my supervisor and many others under her direction conspired to provide no assistance to me, refused to cooperate with me, threatened to have me fired, and sabotaged my efforts to find another job.  All these individuals have since been fired, including my supervisor. I also believe that ohers who stand in my way of my spiritual path and calling also will lose their jobs or the promotions they so want.

There were those who lied, deceived, and cheated on me during our romantic relationship or with my romantic partner, who lost their romantic relationships with those they love in their lives. It is not a coincidence that we shall receive what we give, whether good or bad.  What goes around, really does come around.  This is particularly true of those who are on their spiritual paths.  If you attempt to derail or sabotage their efforts while on their path, you shall receive a swift and reciprocol response.

The message is do good, and good will return to you!  You never know who you are attempting to help or hurt, and either way, it will come back to you, sometime swiftly!  (Copyright 2016 Awakening Journey with All Rights Reserved)

Facing My Dark Night


During the Dark Night of the Soul, many issues of betrayal and trust have come up for me.  In order to engage in healthy relationships with others, I must overcome these fears of betrayal and trust as well as change my own decisions and behaviors.  My first experience with betrayal and trust began with my own father who forced me to lie and cover up about my sexual abuse he caused.

Because sexual abuse of your own child is such a taboo in any culture, his survival depended upon my willingness to cover up my own sexual abuse by him.  As an adult these type of dynamics repeated in my life where I became involved in relationships where I kept such secrets, and engaged in betrayal and deception.

Five years ago, I was a part of “triangulation” where a man with whom I had an affair was already dating another married woman.  In this dynamic, because I dated him later, I became the other woman in this triangle.  Throughout this on and off relationship, he hid me from her by hiding our interactions, refusing to acknowledge me on Facebook, and coving up my existence in his life.

There were actually four triangles with three occurring concurrently as this woman was already married so she was having an affair with my ex-boyfriend. Her husband also had an affair unbeknownst to her.  My ex-boyfriend while he was still married engaged in an affair with this married woman.  He also cheated on her by having me on the side, and I was married at the time.  All three marriages in these triangles dissolved and was destroyed by these betrayals and breach of trust.  This is karma at work.

As you can already tell by all this drama, betrayal, chaos, and deception, it was all terribly destructive and disturbing.  It takes a lot of very emotionally injured people to play out such destruction, and I was just as responsible as all these individuals.  In this story, reality was far more destructive and bizarre than fiction.

Now, I am in the process of healing this part of me where I was betrayed, and also became the betrayer myself.  This type of “triangulation” is a sign of serious emotional dysfunction caused by past emotional injuries or trauma.  In order to heal these parts of us, we must first admit to what we did, and take responsibility for what we did to ourselves and others.

I have set an intention never to repeat these decisions and behaviors again.  In fact, my vibrational frequency has changed significantly so that I no longer vibrate with this type of negative vibrational frequency.  These behaviors and vibrations no longer resonate with me as I find these behaviors repulsive and dissonant to my current energy.

It is through healing my emotional injuries from childhood and later in adulthood that will  give me another chance at my life of being the best possible version of myself, and living on the path of the highest good. (Copyright 2016 Awakening Journey with All Rights Reserved)


Fond Farwell



Without regret or tears,
You have taught me,
What I could not learn,
On my own.

Even now,
I feel love from you,
That you could not,
Give to me.

I forgive all trespasses,
And wish you fond farewell,
For your path forward,
Filled with peace and love.

Any tears now,
Is full of joy.
For I have found love,
For myself.

May you heal,
As you deserve,
For your soul,
To rest in peace.

Our work is done,
Our karma released.
I let go of your soul,
So I can move forward.

Onto horizons of gold,
From lessons learned,
To never repeat again,
So my heart can heal.

Goodbye and farewell,
May you find the love,
That I finally found,
To cherich and sustain you.

(Copyright 2016 Awakening Journey with All Rights Reserved)

Family Karma


I have been contemplating the concept of family karma recently.  My family has a history of incest/sexual violations, mental illness, and violence.  This is true of both sides of my family, my father’s and mother’s family.  Because they are the same, my parents attracted each other.  As a result, this family karma is deeply entrenched within my family.

I believe this is the karma that I must overcome in addition to my own created karma from past and present lifetimes.  What I have observed about my life is that I have been attracting male sexual predators some of whom are violent as well.  I tend to attract mentally ill women and men into my life, and many of them also suffered sexual or physical violence in their past.

Under the Law of Attraction, we attract who we are, so I have been zealously trying to heal my sexual injuries including incest and sexual assault/violence that I suffered as a child and as an adult.  I also know there is mental illness in my family as I also suffered from depression and anxiety.

Since practicing my Emotional Release Practice, yoga, Reiki, energy healing, acupuncture, art, dance, and music therapies, psychotherapy, hyposis, meditation, body work, among other healing modalities, I am attracting very different people into my life for the very first time.  The amazing thing is what attracted or drew me toward those individuals earlier, I feel repulsion or dissonance with them now.

I now recognize the symptoms of mental illness and emotional instability, and I immediately feel the repulsion internally.  The feeling is that of discord, discomfort, and distance.  I do not feel comfortable experiencing this dissonance in my energy field.  I am extremely relieved to experience these new feelings, as my old patterns no longer feel right or comfortable to me now.  May you find a new way of feeling and being. (Copyright 2016 Awakening Journey with All Rights Reserved)


Karma and Relationships


Many in the spiritual community talk about twin flames, soul mates, and karmic relationship.  I must confess that I don’t believe relationships or our life partners are fated as these relationship labels indicate.  I believe that we have free will to determine what is right for us at a certain time in our lives with the person that feels right for us at that time. This may change as we heal our emotional wounds, grow emotionally and physically, or move from place to place.

What I do believe comes into play in relationships is the concept of karma.  My understanding of karma is that we could have created karma with another soul from past lives or we can create karma in our present life.  For example, if we have unresolved issues as we may have wronged others or others may have wronged us, this issue must be resolved between the two souls.  This happened to me, and the key to resolution is forgiveness without forgetting the past wrong that is the lesson we learned.

The second kind of karma is ones we create in our present lives. Everyone has created negative and positive karma with others.  I can safely say that there are no beings who have no karma to resolve that is created in the present.  This is particularly true in romantic relationships when we have wronged others meaning that we have deceived, betrayed, or lied to our loved ones over entering into another romantic relationship, such as an extra-marital affair or cheating on our romantic partners.

Many may argue with me about this point.  However, no matter how two people try to move on from how this relationship intially began, it will be wrought with problems as it began through deception, betrayal, and lies.  This foundation is not sound, and your loved ones will not wholeheartedly support this relationship.  I believe this is the karma created through the deception, betrayal and lies to our loved ones.

Karma will stay with our souls from lifetime to lifetime, so we may run but we can’t hide.  No amount of our egos’ delusions can change karma. So if you decide to enter into another romantic relationship, make sure you have honestly told your spouse or partner that your relationship with them is over, and is no longer working.  Enter the next relationship through honesty and truth so negative karma is not created by this new relationship.

As it is said, life is an echo.  What you do and say are reflected right back to you.  Do good, and good will return to you!  (Copyright 2016 Awakening Journey with All Rights Reserved)

The Secret to Karma


Have you ever had negative karma with others?  It can be from a possible past life gone wrong with another, or others have done harm or wrong to you in this life.  When we have karma with others, we will feel an irresistable attraction like a magnet.  The purpose of this attraction is to help the soul resolve this past or present karma. This is when we must take notice, and use this opportunity to resolve and release this karma.

Case in point: I met a man five years ago who I recall having a past life experience.  I recalled that he was a suitor of mine in the 1800’s in the American south. My family was well to do, and he was interested in my family’s money.  Although I was in love with him, I was unwilling to ask my family for money on his behalf.  When I became pregnant, he left me and my daughter for another woman.  I was forced to give up my daughter for adoption as women could not have children out of wedlock back then.

When I met him again in this life, I had a magnetic attraction to him.  Regrettably, nearly the same thing happened again in this lifetime.  This time, he gave me a sexually transmitted disease, and was involved with a married woman and many others while dating me. It is great irony that the same events will repeat from lifetime to lifetime if we do not resolve this karma with others.

This time, I understood what I needed to do which is to leave him because I realized in this life that I deserve better than to be treated with such disrespect and disregard.  However, it took me a long time to forgive him which is the secret to resolving and releasing past karma. If you continue to harbor anger and resentment toward the other, the karma remains between the two.

When I finally forgave him, the attraction and attachment simply vanished.  I realized that I was contributing to this negative karma betweem us.  Like a house of cards, all the cards tumbled down when I forgave him and his married mistress.  The greater irony is that this married woman’s husband left her for another woman. Furthermore, this man’s family does not welcome this married woman, because they had the affair while he still was married which broke up his family.  Talk about karma!

When we create karma with others, we shall reap what we sow.  In order for me to rid these two people from my soul life permanently, I needed to forgive them, and give up the anger and resentment toward them.  May you resolve and release your negative karma. (Copyright 2016 Awakening Journey with All Rights Reserved)